Possiblities are endless

Here I sit late at night thinking...that could be a good and bad thing. I'm thinking of my trip to VA. What will it be like? I know I was just there in April of this year, but I feel like a different person. Now, I'm officially divorced. Hmm...the possiblities are endless when that is the case. Unlike my ex, I have held true to my vows to the end. I've haven't been in a relationship other then my ex since 1999 when we started dating. It's scary to think about it, however, at the same time it is thrilling! The question I have for myself, "Am I ready?" Ready for a relationship or even just a fling...I don't know. It has been heavy on my heart and I guess I'm just lonely today. The one thing I miss is being able to share those great moments in my life with someone special. Yeah, I know I can share them with my children, but it is just different with another adult that you care about. There is just something about companionship. I do have to say, I won't settle. I'm not going to be that way and I'm going to hold out for someone special who honors me and my children. I guess I look back at my life that I have lived and I see my life, as many have pointed out--yes I see it now, as living it for someone else. There were glimmers of me in there, but most of it was not lived for me. I gave up a lot and sat in the background.

You'll be happy for me, I've made it to church the last three weeks! I've enjoyed every moment and have been hanging on every word of our Pastor's sermons (http://www.silverdalebaptist.com/). The sermons are just what I need. They put my life in perspective AND I can't beleive how in some ways I'm on the right path. It is a great feeling to hear the sermons and think...oh, I do that. Other ways, I know that I need to give myself up to God and let Him work on me. I know I'm not perfect. I think my next step is to do some volunteer work. I've signed up for the Alzheimer's walk in Silverdale on September 20th--you can sponsor me at 2008 Olympic Peninsula Alzheimer's Walk. I need to get involved in other things that are selfless and I think volunteering is a great place to start.

Well, I've talked long enough. I think after my trip to VA I'll be looking for a way to volunteer. Hold me to it!

-Debbie